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"i wish i didnt follow others and did what i believed, even when nobody believed me yet. now ive to start late to do things that i wanted to bc i couldnt bring myself to finish what others expected me to."

You’re seeing how putting others’ expectations first pushed your own goals back, and that late start feels frustrating.

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"I regret putting my all constantly knowing i won’t receive nothing back"

It can be really draining to keep giving when you feel like you're not getting anything in return.

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"I need to yell and scream at someone all of my frustrations out loud, but I'm just stuck inside a box with no opening. I act like I tell my parents everything, but I tell them the smaller things, like, someone's annoying me, and stuff like that. I need someone to talk to that won't judge, like a robot. But my mom just finds a way to turn it around on my medicine. "She needs to go up a dose." "Oh, it's because you didn't take your medicine." "See? Your medicine helps you so much!" It's exhausting."

It sounds like being trapped inside that box makes the frustration pile up, and the way your mom reacts just adds to the noise. Having a place where you can just say what's on your mind without it being turned back on you would be a relief.

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"je regrette de ne pas avoir quitter ma ville plus tot"

C'est comme si vous aviez l'impression d'avoir raté une occasion de changer votre vie.

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